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Wednesday, July 24, 2002
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"All day I want and nothing feels right."
- enamor
grey day. Thinking about Adam today. "The test of any good speaker is wether it brings me back. back to that place where he was shining and the words poured from his throat like sunlight. when the strings beneath his fingers were electrolytes enlivening my heart." They are All doomed to fail. Someday, someone I love, someone who is good for me - will love me best of all. Until then? buck up my heart. Its alright.. in some pointless cosmic sense I know its alright. We haven't spoken really for weeks..since I got back from visiting him in fact. And though there are days, like today, when I miss him.. the happy converstations, he doesn't make me sad. I don't think that he will ever make me sad. Its more of a... I dont know. Something like a hole.. waiting to be filled. and being around him filled it. It was brilliant. magic. Well, now I'm not around him. oh well. "Saying too much is always disenchanting".
Its always hard to leave magic behind.
sound: Enamor "More Than You Know", Black Lab: your body above me in particular - "Wash it Away".
taste: triple cappucino, marlboro reds, green chartreuse, sorrow?
distractions: Sister MAchine Gun: Burn
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