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Monday, February 10, 2003
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tonight I'm keeping score...
(-1) still no financial aid. dread and sadness. And yet another chem lab that I will be unprepared for.
(-2) have accomplished next to no calculus tonight but I froze my fingers digging about in the attic and managed to find my old (and only non-tattered, presentable looking) coat. So yay I can now go drop off job appliations without looking like a badly dressed hoodlum. (-1) I also found something like 15 pairs of my shoes and an entire garbage bag full of clothing that my parents packed away up there when I moved to Australia, and then immediately forgot existed. However, I can't complain too loudly - while I did occasionally miss some of those items I have gotten along just fine without them for something like 2 years now. whatever. its nice to have my stuff back. (0)
I hate being poor. I have to send money to D so that he will ship me my stuff back from Oz. I need to get my leather trench repaired. I owe Ben $10 for last Monday's school supplies and $35 more for my last winter's switchblade. My hair needs cutting. I still need that chem packet. There isn't much food in the pantry and tomorrow is Anchor Monday so most of Bun's Monday 20 will get spent on dinner and beer. *sigh* And I am absolutely and utterly worthless at bringing in cash money. I know that's not true but it sure as hell feels like it lately. At least thanks to my benbrother we have enough cigarettes to last for a few days.
Bunny began bargaining with Jaesin tonight for the bag/guitar strap that he, jaesin, commisioned. So far it looks like I am going to get at least 100$ for it - which is good seeing as how its worth $220(+1) but not for at least 2 weeks, as Jaesin's pet had an unexpected medical emergency and at the moment he's having to cope with an 800$ vetrinarian bill. (0) Poor Jaesin.
I'm stupid. Its late and I'm exhausted and I haven't gone to bed yet. (-1)
My eyesight has been deteriorating horribly as of late (-6)
today, affter bun and I had sex, I broke down and litterally sobbed in his arms for something like 5 minutes. I was so sad and frustrated about still having doubts regarding his conduct with B while we are not together. Its not that I don't/didn't believe him when he tells me that they are not having sex, its that wether or not my better judgement knew that he was telling the truth, I still had those gut wrenching doubt on such a regular basis - but after my bout of tears and his reaction I feel better. Hell I haven't had a single episode since... I know that it hasn't been very long but the very thought that I may be over this is incredible.(+5)
Final score for the day = +5. It was a hard battle but I seem to have won with flying colors. Now off to bed for ferricgirls.
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